Things have improved since a week ago. I felt like I would never leave the house, to be quite honest, but the opposite has been true. I've made a few friends, have gone places...

saw pan's labyrinth with a guy named Sam. Fantastic movie.

I moved out of my mom's house this morning into a house with my high school friend Billy who lives in Orlando. People change, obviously, but I have so far remained blindsided by Billy. I wouldn't consider myself to be a difficult person to get along with, but I feel like I'm intruding on his lifestyle a bit. I like small talk, something he doesn't really enjoy. I don't have any other friends in the area yet, so other than surfing the internet (which is basically all I did in Punta Gorda) I don't have any other options.

Overall, I would describe the way I'm feeling as "awkward." I haven't quite figured out the best way to interact with him yet.

That's only part of it, of course. I already miss my family a little bit, which I guess is probably natural, but that doesn't make me feel less childish. There are also four other people (!) living in this house, something new to me. I've met Ross and Bethanie (Billys' girlfriend) and both of them seem very cool, very earthy. I like that.

I guess my point is that I don't like feeling like I'm intruding on someone's lifestyle, and I do. It hasn't even been 12 hours yet, though. Christ.

I need more LJ friends.

It has been a long time since I was here(again), and it will likely be a long time before I’m here again. Anyone who is reading this is very much used to this dynamic, however, so I know that I’m not hurting anyone’s feelings or sensibilities by saying so up front.

The question on everyone’s mind is perhaps, “What has this Evan fellow been doing with his time?” Then again, it perhaps is also, “What’s for dinner?” Sadly, I can’t answer the second question, but the first I can swing.

Not much goes on in Punta Gorda, FL, but I’m doing my best to make things interesting. My goals right now are to attend college in the spring to major in a writing field but also to remain happy as a single individual. Anyone who has been speaking with me frequently (it certainly isn’t most of you) knows that I have recently ended a six-month relationship (by my own choice) for a few reasons, but mostly so that I can try to remain content without a companion to cover up certain aspects of being single I didn’t like.

I won’t say much more on this subject here, but I will say this: Mike was good to me for the most part, but lacked intelligence, conversational skill, and experience. He also tried his absolute best to suppress who he really was in favor of a person he thought was stronger, “cooler” (for lack of better phraseology), and more efficient, but ended up coming off more as someone who wanted to cover up who he really was. There was nothing inherently wrong with Mike. There was, however, something wrong with whom he wanted to be, and I didn’t want to date that person. Also, he’s a furry who role-plays as a pony on the internet and who cheated on me at least once and likely thought about it many more times. He also called me “fat.”

Yeah.

I’m enjoying being single again. I like the idea that I’m free to find someone that makes me happy. I won’t be dating closeted individuals again, as that caused a few problems with Mike and his family that I won’t go into. I won’t be dating people with a lack responsibility, or people who offer me the world. I want the person I date to have obligations other than me and family we can trust. I would like to meet their family as their boyfriend and not as a friend.

I enjoyed writing all of that. I think I’ll come back soon.

Life been shaky in my neck of the woods, but not without its redeeming qualities. Loan payments are scheduled to begin soon, and I can't really afford them yet; I'm 21 and still live at home with Mom, which wouldn't be so bad except I feel like a bit of a loser; I was recently told that my friends in college have a ball making fun of me from time to time, which is a bit more annoying to me than it should be.

I work now (I didn't for a while). I'm still depressed but I'm getting along without medication for now (I can't afford it). I'm still kind of paranoid, socially (I can't really be in a room with strangers without alcohol in my system). I've got problems, and there's no doubt about it.

None of these things are going to kill me. I'm still alive, I'm still kicking. I have a boyfriend, named Mike, and he's great (a bit emotionally dry sometimes, but I've come to terms with the fact that I tend to be attracted to those types). He's sweet, he cares about me, we enjoy each others' company, and we make each other laugh (even though we're not very funny, either of us). It's a simple relationship. Neither of us have much, and neither of us want much. Eventually, we'd like to move into an apartment together, but life is complicated and that goal is temporarily on hold.

Just a small update with what's up. Later, dudes.

Only you can let it in

My room mate:

"This morning, I got the most overwealming sense of college life possible when I woke up and saw the box of overturned doughnuts on the ground.  I think it was when I turned around and saw the box of pizza on top of your computer that I finally decided that a little spring cleaning was in order.  Here's your broom.  Go."

Taken from Emma's Xanga:

President Bush was asked today for his position regarding Roe versus Wade.

His response: "I don't care how people get out of New Orleans."

Congratulations to the author of http://emosong.ytmnd.com/ who has successfully created the only YTMND that doesn't suck.  This is fucking hysterical, but you'll have to open it in IE.

It's sad, because it's true.  Hey, entire population of New York: this is for you.

The University of Miami's Crisis Decision Team met this morning at 8:00 a.m. to discuss the University's emergency preperations for the oncoming strorm, Tropical Storm Rita.  What the University doesn't want you to know (and what they won't tell you) is that the CDT is actually no more than some guy sitting in front of a computer watching the weather channel.  I mean, come on—it doesn't take a team of trained experts to see that the weather conditions aren't suitable for normal classes. 

As a result of this meeting, an announcement was made at around 11:45 this morning cancelling any and all classes and campus activity after noon today and through Tuesday.  So, my question for the single guy posing as a team of trained individuals is this:  Why the fuck did you wait until noon today?  Look at the fucking pictures.  There is a storm.  It's coming.  Even if it doesn't hit us dead on, we're going to get weather conditions suitable for a storm.  It doesn't make sense to make us think that school will run as normal and then cancel classes in an e-mail announcement fifteen fucking minutes before school actually closes.
( Read more... )

I guess it had to happen eventually.  Inevitably, I would cave to the unceasing cesspool known only as peer pressure.  At some point, I have to do it, that is give people what they want: an update.

Lately, things have been half-and-half in a way.  I guess that you could say my life has been a manifestation of an ambiguous answer to the age-old question: "Is the glass half-empty, or half-full?"  In my case, it did just what it usually does at the beginning of a semester—weaves between the two, and eventually settles in on an inevitability—the glass is empty, most of the time, as if it's a glass on the table at a Denny's Restaraunt. 
( Read more... )

http://abcnews.go.com/US/story?id=96695&page=1

Thought of the day:

Celebrating Independence Day with fireworks and a barbeque is like putting a "Support our Troops" ribbon magnet on the bumper of your SUV.

I'm serious.  If someone speaking against Christianity offends you, or you are OTHERWISE easily offended, don't click the link below because I'm not interested in arguing any of these points with you.  This is simply intended to be humorous for those of us that agree with the things on this list.  Again, if you think I'm a heretic or disagree with this list, I don't give a flying fuck so don't bother telling me.

I found this on the internet somewhere.



( You Were Warned! )

It looks as though I may actually be going back to UM next semester.

Except I'll be Christyless.  Last semester I was Michaelaless and this semester Michaela will come back and Christy will be gone until January.

It's kinda like that episode of the Space Cases where Catlina is in a ship that blows up and in order to save her, her invisible best friend (who actually lives in another dimension) named Suzee pulls her out of Catalina's dimension and into hers, thereby taking her place and saving her life and causing a plothole so large that I can't even begin to know how they didn't realize it and Suzee replaces Catalina for the entire next season.

Yeah.

With forecasters predicting a more turbulant hurricane season this year than ever before (including last year's Grand Slam of Florida's costs), I've begun to look at Hurricane Vacation Options.

Fifteen named storms are supposed to surface this year -- that's just crazy.

Anyone have any suggestions on good places to Hurrication?

Fine.  I'll let you.  You know who you are -- and I wouldn't be posting this here, except I know it's the only way this message will get through.  And by the way, if you're so into getting away from me, why the hell are you reading this?

Just go away.

I'm not really a blonde joke person, but this is a really good one.

This year blew.

You know it, I know it.  But I have to get over it.  My future is at UM.  I don't feel right sitting here because I messed up one year.  I can go back, I can succeed, and I will do it.

But, I need to know how.

I'm going to switch majors, take another loan for the next semester, and go in with my fists swinging and I tell you, I am not going to fail this time.

Mark my words, this is not over!

Please do not call my cell phone, as I will not be answering for a while!